Perfectionism: why and how to beat it
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A guide to doing great work without fixating on flawlessness
Dan Shipper is an entrepreneur, writer, and the co-founder and CEO of Every, a bundle of business-focused newsletters, founded in 2020. Find him on Twitter: @danshipper. This post was co-written by Dan and Kieran O'Hare.
I’m not a perfectionist, I’m too enlightened for that. But I am concerned with making things turn out great. Both performance-wise, and morally. I know you can’t achieve perfection, but you can asymptotically approach it. And that’s really all I’m after.
When the graph of my performance approaches the asymptote it’s like no other kind of high. When I’m pounding out words and they’re coming out right, or I’m making decisions and moving the pieces around on the chess board at Every and watching the numbers go up, or someone tells me I’m a good person or I did a good job. Ahhh, the best.
When that’s happening it’s like there’s an invisible string pulling me up by my heels, straightening my back, and puffing out my chest, so I’m gliding on tiptoes down the street. I’m proud, I’m special, I’m happy, I’m motivated. In short: I’m the shit.
My co-founder Nathan, though. He’s a perfectionist. You should see that man design a logo, or write a sentence. Agonizing over every little detail. Crushed when it doesn’t go right. I’ve been trying to help him with it. (May I remind you that I’m a Very Good Person—not yet Jesus, but approaching the asymptote!)
The thing is I haven’t been able to fix Nathan yet. Perfectionism is a tough nut to crack.
That’s why I got so excited when Dr. Clarissa Ong and Dr. Michael Twohig, the authors of The Anxious Perfectionist, reached out to me about their book. It’s about science-based tools for overcoming perfectionism, and so I suddenly had a perfect plan: Nathan could read the book, and then I could have him chat with the perfectionism people, and maybe he’d figure out how to chill out. I set up a call with all of us, but Nathan didn’t show up. (Classic perfectionistic avoidance.)
This story was originally published on on Every.to
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Comments (14)
Malaika MpressMe@malaika_mpressme
Fantastic! I actually have become more productive when I came to understand that my procrastination is my process, and forgiving myself for that. I also learned that my procrastination was directly tied to a lack of preparation. This often leads to lack of motivation, confidence and creativity. So now that I understand all that ... I am intentionally using my "procrastination" to become better prepared for the task on my plate, which has resulted in me being more productive.
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In this world, nobody is flawless. But even though we work hard to do our best—I'm a professional London College Assignment Helper, mistaken blunders are inevitable from time to time. This is a great and useful topic for us.
This is such an informative blog that highlights flawlessness, which is the major problem of a best nursing case study writers who went through this problem which irritates a lot. Someone, please guide me. Thanks!
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Great article!
Thank you Dan. This is such a solid write up, and one that I have resonated with greatly. I know that perfectionism and obsession is consuming my life and this suggested book will help me greatly. I will bookmark this piece and reference back again before starting a new role. Seriously, this has been so helpful to me, thank you once again.
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